Holy cats – the semester is almost over. I have to say that overall, this past year has been my favorite at Fontbonne. It’s crazy, but honestly things just keep getting better and better for me here. My college experience so far has been just as wonderful as I ever could have imagined, and I am so thankful for that.

It’s crazy to think about all the factors that influenced my college decision way back when – how lucky I am that it all worked out and that I made the right decision. Next year will be my last here: I’ll be finishing up my undergrad in dietetics, applying for internships (probably in Texas and South Carolina, mostly), taking on my last stand as Environmental Club president, and of course running and laughing and enjoying life with my friends. I’ve met so many great people here at Fontbonne, and although some of them have moved on to other places and lives, I still think of them fondly.

It’s always a transition to move home for the summer, but although I love living here with my friends, I appreciate the relaxation and time to reconnect with myself that it brings.  On the agenda for this summer is running, tanning, baking, volunteering, organizing, crafting, and planning for next year and beyond. It will be nice to have a couple of months to enjoy the beautiful sunshine. See you in the fall!

Well, my sophomore year of college is almost over. I cannot believe how fast it has gone by. This time next week I’ll only have one more final to go, but there is still plenty to do before then, including “Fun Week”.

Fun Week is the finals week of Fontbonne where my roommate and I incorporate something fun to do each day. We’re pretty busy with finals and projects and other school work, but we’re still going to fit some fun things in! We’re planning on checking out a lot of retail places we’ve never been before. Soft Surroundings, CLR MSTR, ReFresh, and The Limited are on the list. We even have coupons for a couple places. A little retail therapy between tests will be nice! We’re also planning on going to a burger place downtown called Bailey’s Range for dinner. It was highly recommended by a friend. There’s a fashion exhibition in the Loop we’re going to look at one day. For an afternoon snack we’re taking a trip to Trader Joe’s. I’ve never been. There’s lots of fun happening during fun week!

On a side note, last Friday’s Springfest concert was a great time. Fontbonne isn’t as boring as you might think on the weekend!

Thanks for reading..

My one year anniversary of independence is quickly approaching.

Last year, on July 1st, 2012, I loaded up my car (and a few others) and bounded down I-70 as quickly as I could. Speed limits were not holding me back and neither was the constant ringing of my phone from family members who didn’t get to say their final goodbyes. As much as I denied it to those who asked, I was leaving for many more reasons other than to start school. My friends, and especially my family, knew I wasn’t coming back.

(It sounds melodramatic, but for those of you who have kept up with the blog, you know this isn’t the case.)

Since July, I’ve been lonely and uncomfortable in my own skin more times than I’d like to admit, but that’s because I have been challenging my typical ways of thinking and trying new things, and sometimes found myself faced with situations I never thought I’d encounter. Whether these situations were full of joy and laughter, or left me weeping, they ultimately helped me discover myself.

Here are some of the  lessons I’ve learned this far:

1- I have a voice that deserves to be heard (and so do you). Anyone who makes me question my right to have an opinion, doesn’t have a place in my life. While I’m not confrontational or anywhere near the aggressive end of the personality spectrum, I’ve found more effective ways for me to express my emotions, voice my thoughts, and de-stress. This blog is the perfect example. Some can’t handle my honesty, and that’s okay. They’ll come around, or they won’t. But for the first time ever, I’m comfortable (not scared) to say what needs to be said, and that’s liberating.

2- It’s important to play up your strengths AND accept your weaknesses. And as a single girl, living alone in the city, it’s especially important.

For me, I can’t solve even the smallest of car issues. When I first started driving, I dated a mechanic who took care of all my car problems. He was nice enough that even after our breakup, he didn’t mind keeping up his role as Mr. Fix-It. However, moving over 60 minutes away and dating new people, he no longer offered any solutions.

When winter hit, I, legitimately, didn’t think I would survive. My dingy cavalier couldn’t handle the frigid temperatures and my freshly manicured nails weren’t about to pop the hood to diagnose any problems. Luckily, no matter the problem, my car was able to make the short trip to the neighboring mechanic service. It was in their lobby that I realized I COULD survive; it was all about working my strengths. I smiled kindly at the man behind the counter, explained what my issue was, and asked for help. I’ve been in their lobby three times since the icy days of January, and have yet to spend a dime. I may not be a pro at fixing cars, but I can be quite charming… And that gets my car fixed.

3- People mirror how you treat yourself. This is probably the hardest lesson I have had to learn, but as the oldest sibling and a bit of a workaholic, I often prioritize my needs (and wants) at the bottom of the list. When I notice that this is where I fall on someone else’s priority list, it’s heartbreaking, but when I devalue my needs and wants, how can I expect anyone to else to think they’re valuable? Like the old saying goes, “we accept the love we think we deserve.”

This lesson is a work-in-progress, but I’ve acknowledged it, and hey, that counts for something.

4- People also fail (sometimes on a daily basis), so it is important to trust yourself. When people don’t do their jobs, you are your only ally.  It doesn’t matter what regulations or codes of ethics are put into place, people still fail to do their jobs. For me, my life would’ve been (and be) a lot easier if one of my teachers did what they were supposed to do as mandated hotline reporters. All the signs they needed to see were clear, but for some reason (a reason I’ll never know), nobody ever acknowledged them. In fact, a large part of my family works as educators, and they failed to step in, also.  I’m not placing blame; I’m just noticing that people don’t do what they’re supposed to do. I’m over it now because I (me, myself, a singular noun) picked up the pieces and did what I had to do. But it still sucks knowing that people you thought highly of, aren’t as great as they could be. And I know from my education and social work courses that these statements are valid (see Lesson #1: I have a voice that deserves to be heard).

As a girl who never thought the word independent would be used to describe her, I’ve failed (yes, I recognize that I’m not perfect) to realize how many things I’ve done by myself before I only had myself to rely upon.

5- I don’t need people to understand my choices. I like it when people are supportive and accepting, but I know I can’t please everyone. I also know that NEED and WANT are two different words. So while I might want someone to understand why I did something, I don’t need them to. That being said, when someone doesn’t understand my choices, it shouldn’t steer my direction. People don’t understand what they don’t know. And, after all, it’s MY life; I’m going to be the one dealing with the consequences- good or bad- of the decision. And considering how other people have made decisions that have made my life suck,  I try not to do things that impact others in negative ways.

I’m still learning how to say no, how to not let stress tie my intestines into knots (literally), and how to embrace the moment. Even with these lessons to learn, I’m proud of what I HAVE learned.

This year, on July 1st, 2013, I will pack up my car again and move further into the city. But this time, I’ll follow the speed limit and answer my phone; I’m not running from anything anymore.

Happy one year anniversary to me! I did it.

As this semester is coming to an end, and I am stressing out because as much as exams have snuck up on me, they have clearly snuck up on my professors even more! All of my teachers are throwing multiple projects or papers at me right now, trying to make sure they cover all the material they said we would and sometimes I just want to be like “THIS IS NOT MY ONLY CLASS!” But alas, I don’t, and each semester I survive and over break wonder why I stressed so much during the school year!

I cannot believe that come May 13 I will have officially completed half of my college career! It really is crazy how fast time flies! I’ve been thinking about the last two years a lot the past couple of days, and I look back at the friends I had the first week of college compared to the smaller amount I have now, and I am really happy with the good friends I have! College has been great so far, and I cannot wait to see what this second half has in store for me!

But first…I need to finish this semester!

This week was one busy week at Fontbonne. It was my last week of class before finals! This year at Fontbonne has been great, but I am so excited for next week. My roommate and I have decided to make the week of finals “fun week” and do all the things we should have throughout the year when we were too busy doing homework. We plan on going to the zoo, doing lots (I mean lots) of shopping, visiting the art and history museum, and enjoying some of the restaurants St. Louis has to offer. We have mapped out the week and in between studying and finals will be having some fun!

Today I got to go to a Cardinals game! I have been waiting since August to go to the stadium and see the Redbirds play again. Today, me, my sister, her friend, and my roommate went. The game was amazing, except we lost and got terrible sunburns — really bad sunburns! Ouch!

This time next week I will be about to leave to go home for summer. I am ready to enjoy the next three months and not worry about anything school-related. Our floor has been having an “open door” contest since February and I won! Go me! I can’t wait to come back for my second year of Fontbonne, but having a few months off is going to be wonderful. Hello summer!

I have seven school days left. I’m having a lot of trouble motivating myself to do anything at this point, especially after the awesome Real Estate concert on Sunday night (I got one of the guys in the band to sign the handwritten set list I stole off the stage!) and the totally epic M83 show last night. At this point, I’m so done with homework and am totally ready to focus on making and eating good food, running, sleeping, and going to more awesome concerts. In other words, my brain is already starting to go into summer break mode.
Unfortunately, though, I have to face reality:

1. Organic Chemistry Final (that will be a monster.)
2. Anatomy Final
3. Two presentations
4. A book to read
5. Four papers to write

Yikes. This final stretch is not going to be fun.

Hang in there everyone, and have an amazing summer break!

-Carly

“Outro” by M83

Today, I was listening to the radio and heard that it is the National Day of Prayer. I find myself thinking of when to find time to pray and concentrate on God alone. But when would I not be distracted? I have an IEP to write, a couple of journal articles to read and write about, and a test. Plus, I’m helping my 12-year-old son with his unit on China, and I have to help him research and make a Jeopardy board. Then there is dinner plans because the hubby will be calling soon to find out what is for dinner…it’s like he plans the day based on what yummy concoction I will come up with. Ohh, plus there are all the errands I need to run, and those green beans aren’t going to plant themselves.

Then I hear the song, “He Is” by Mark Schultz who is singing “be still my soul and know he is.” The rest of the lyrics say, “Father, let the world just fade away. Let me feel your presence in this place Lord. I’ve never been so weary. How I need to know you’re near me. Father, let the world just fade away.”

I think that is a great jump start to finding the peace that I want so that I can pray for all my cares and concerns, those of friends and family. I have to finish this now because I am inspired to “be still” and let my soul open to the Lord in prayer.

I will be praying for each of you to make it through finals and get all those assignments in. Also, that you all find time daily to “be still” and be with the Lord.

Blessings- Sherry

These past weeks have been quite stressful on me. I could let things get to me, be upset, or have a mental breakdown. OR I can make myself to-do lists, and I can have the mindset of I CAN DO THIS. Once you tell yourself you can’t do something, then you won’t. It is not hard to back away and be a coward. It is hard to stand up, say you can do something, and study your butt off to meet the grades that you need. This thinking really applies to my life right now. I would love to just go off and hide in a corner and not do anything, but that is not possible. There is only a little over a week left in this school year, and it is time to finish what I have started. Until then, I will be studying, doing what is right, and counting down the hours until summer. Only 229 left! (I think… I was never good at math.)

Picture this. You’re in class in AB Hall, and your professor accidentally teaches for five minutes after the class is supposed to have ended. Your next class in all the way over in the Fine Arts building, and you don’t want to be late. You sprint down the hall and down the stairs. But before you run across that grassy triangular area between AB and the arcade connecting AB and Ryan Hall, guilt seeps in. Do you really want to cut across the grass that the fine people in the Physical Plant take such good care of?

Now, thanks to the work of the Biological Sciences Organization as well as many other Fontbonne student volunteers, you don’t have to worry about that.  This past Monday, in honor of Earth Day, the BSO put stepping stones in that triangular grassy area.  Working in the spirit of Dr. Seuss’s famous character The Lorax and proudly wearing tshirts boasting, “I speak for the trees, for the trees have no tongue,” students planted ten trees around campus – most of which are in between AB Hall and Big Bend, and one of which is neatly-situated in the grassy area adjacent to the stepping stones.

So during the next few weeks of school as the road towards summer seems long and treacherous, just be glad that you now at least have a shorter route to your classes.

As we only have about two and half weeks left of this year (can’t wait to be able to say I completed my freshman year of college!), everything is beginning to pile up. Teachers are at the point where they are realizing they don’t have as much time left to teach us everything they need/want to, so they begin to add more and more and after a while you look at your Griffin Scratch and wonder, “When am I supposed to have time to do all this, eat, sleep, and still keep up hygiene and NOT go insane?!”

Okay, so not maybe everyone’s thought process, but when you work at least four nights a week like I do, it is really overwhelming when you just think about all the work that has to be done these next few weeks.

I keep telling myself that I can do this, I can get all the work done, and I will succeed and then I can enjoy summer! I have been giving myself a few little stress breaks lately that include: Ted Drewes, a St. Louis must, trips to the batting cages to relieve stress, drawing with chalk, bike riding, and walks to Concordia’s fields. Once May 14th is over, and I have freshman year under my belt, I will be a much happier, un-stressed person! I cannot wait for next year to live in Medaille and have my own room. I feel like sophomore year will just be all around better in many ways.

I needed to write this blog because sometimes just ranting about stress makes you feel a little less stressed. I apologize to anyone who read this, but thank you for helping me

Happy Exams, and “may the odds be ever in your favor”! (Hunger Games quote)