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Campus Ministry

I feel very grateful to have been able to attend Fontbonne University and to have on campus mass on Sunday’s at 7pm. At the end of the week, it is always important to set aside a time for reflection and also to give thanks. Even if there was nothing extraordinary happening the week before, there is always something to be grateful for.

As we approach the holidays, let’s not forget that we have the beautiful Doerr Chapel located in the 2nd floor of Ryan Hall. If you have never been there before, I encourage you to go. It is usually a quiet place, but a very beautiful one.

Mass is also offered on Friday’s at noon and there are many other activities to get involved in! Visit the Campus Ministry website to find other ways to get involved



Let’s take a trip down memory lane, shall we? Maybe I’ll even throw in a few deep, thought-provoking quotes for good measure along the way to break things up. Plus, I will add links to external content wherever I see fit.

Now that you can’t say I didn’t warn you, let’s begin. Read on at your own discretion.

As I mentioned on my last post, this past Lenten season has been by far one of the most incredible and life-changing of my twenty-one years of existence, spiritually, mentally, emotionally, physically. While I don’t want to go into details about it, I will say that it got me thinking about all of the ways in which maybe I sell myself short out of fear or because doing something new would give me that, “Oh man, somebody bring me the trash can, I’m going to stress-vom my almond butter sandwich, here” feeling, and let’s be real: I loathe that feeling. So, for the sake of keeping my lunch in my stomach (among other reasons), I’ve opted out. But is that what I really want for myself? And, to put a more spiritual twist on it, as it was Lent when all of this came to me, is that what God wants for me? To hide my talents and gifts and my true super-happy self from the world because I’m too afraid of how others might respond to that girl?


Every year in the spring, I do the Busy Person’s Retreat, put on by Campus Ministry (side note: I’m now on the CM team for next year…SUPER EXCITED.). This year, my spiritual director asked me who had hurt me in the past. After all, this is likely where my insecurities and anxieties stem from. And as I was thinking about it these past few days, it finally hit me: ballet. My time as a ballet dancer is largely to blame for a lot of the negative feelings I get in my gut before I go and do something new. Let me explain.

During my freshman year of college, I made myself take classes at one of the hardest, best ballet schools in St. Louis. Behind as I was, I was put in the class with the twelve-year-olds, who often asked me if I really was in college. I remember one such conversation with this little red-headed prima. I told her my age/year in school. Her response?


True story.

Anyhow, this place was awful. The girls were so, so, so talented. And they knew it. And they had money. (Okay, their parents did.) And they knew it. I, on the other hand, was the college girl who not only was not going to be attending ABT’s summer intensive in NYC, but was also the one who clearly had nothing better to do than hang around with twelve-year-olds in tights every Saturday. They talked bad about me. They exchanged weird looks when they thought I wasn’t looking. I wanted to disappear. I did the next best thing and left at the end of the semester, as dancing was no longer fun at that point.

So I suppose what I’m getting at here is that I’ve been burned. And, as much as I hate to say it, I’ve never let those wounds completely heal, and instead have been anxiously awaiting the next time when somebody else, like some fancy Lululemon clad, Boston-qualifier decides to give me the dreaded once-over. And, as a result, those anxieties have kept me exactly where they want to keep me: somewhere safe, where I can’t get hurt or embarrassed by somebody I know in my heart I’m bigger than.

But that’s no way to live: letting past experiences keep you from being whom you want to be now, or letting people who are probably actually intimidated by you let you believe that you should in fact be afraid of them.

So this evening I did something I was scared to do. My digestive system hated me all day. But this evening, for the first time, I went and joined a running group. I wanted to turn around and go back to my car. Confession: I did. But then I told my Kayanos that they’d be sorry if they carried me anywhere but to where the other runners were. So I walked over to them. And we ran.

And you know what? I was so, so, so glad I did. The running community, unlike the hateful, competitive world of ballet, has been nothing but welcoming of me. I may not have the best splits (HA! Get it…we’re talking about dance and running here!). I may not run every day because of my foot (that’s another thing I have ballet to thank for. Thanks, pointe, thanks.). I may not be Scott Jurek in all of his awesomeness. But you know what? I’m still a runner! And everyone I’ve met thus far has told me nothing less.

Sure, I’ve been hurt in the past. But I don’t want to let that hold me back anymore, because, as I’ve come to discover through running, nobody wants to humiliate me or make me feel bad anymore. And if they do? They’re not the people I need in my life anyway.

So! What are you waiting for? Me to give you a quote? Okay!

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”

So eloquently said, Mark.


“All of Me” by Tanlines (I swear the number of times I play this album rivals the number of times my little sis plays T-Swift’s new one, whatever it’s called (which I should know considering how much we hear it)).

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This semester’s dedicated semester is Foodology. There are so many meaningful events I’ve joined. One of them is “ World Food Day.”

World Food day is a very meaningful day, which has many volunteers join this event to package nutritional food in the USA. Then, the STL World Food Day group shipped the packaged food to the Republic of Tanzania in Africa. Each package of food can feed 7 malnourished children in Africa.

Last Friday, 30 Fontbonne students and faculty volunteered to package food in John Burroughs School. We took a “real” yellow school bus to go to the high school which was the location for gathering all the volunteers to package food in St. Louis. I felt so excited because it was my first time to join the World Food Day, and also my first time to take a real yellow school bus in America. We chatted with each other in the school bus, just like high school students.

After we arrived at the high school in Ladue, we wore aprons and covered our hair to protect the food. Then, Fontbonne separated into five teams to make the food packaging more efficient. Some people put rice into the bag and some people added vitamins. Each food package included brown rice, dried vegetables, soy protein, and a vitamin and mineral packet.

The weight for each package is 390g which can feed 7 kids. Fontbonne’s students and faculty did a very good job on World Food Day. We packaged 504 bags which can feed over 3,000 children in Africa.

Everyone was so happy because we packaged food for over 3000 children in just 45 minutes. We really did a good job packing food. I’m hoping the children in Africa can enjoy the nutrition packages.


Hi Fontbonne!!!

How is everyone doing today? Good, bad, sad, crappy, etc? Well, I sure hope those negative ones have disappeared!

When you have a bad day, it’s hard to stay positive and do things well. I definitely know how that feels because I sure do get grumpy when I’m upset. However, I don’t like to let it control my mind or actions. It’s just not worth it. I tell myself that it’ll get better. I also thank God for that.

Speaking of God, my blog today is about the Metanoia #8 retreat that I just returned from. Metanoia means “change of heart.” In other words, you open yourself up to God so he can give you the love, strength, support, and care that you need. Also, you open yourself up to others. You may not know them or even met them before, but the retreat changes that. There were people that went to the previous retreats as well, including myself. This retreat was my second trip. Why did I go again? Well, I loved it the first time and God continues to surprise me! I also got the chance to understand the people who I already knew and who I just met.

God is not just anybody. I won’t say that I know exactly who he is because I’m still getting to know him. So let’s be patient. I have come to learn and even feel how God has changed my life. There were many times when I’ve doubted myself (actually I still do but not too often) or even hated myself for crazy reasons. But I think about Him, and I know He comforts me every time. I love God.

So, the retreat included Campus Ministry Director, Sarah Boul, Sister Amy Diesen, team members: Isabella (Izzy) Liu, Cassie Dougherty, Catherine Jaeger, Andrea Artz, Andrea Coffey, Sam Beaty, Tyler Fernandez, and Jes Stevens, and retreatants: myself, Hayden Pattinson, Rachel, Brittny Radley, Ana Soares, Chantal Brown, Andrea Bailey, and Deanna. This was a smaller group compared to last year, but we still had a really amazing and energetic team.

Our retreat location this year was in Dittmer, Missouri, about 45 minutes from Fontbonne. It was a very beautiful place and the building is very warm and comfortable. We were divided into different rooms, so I was with Jes, Andrea B., and Sam. Later, we were split into our small groups with a team leader. In my group, I had Jes (team leader), Hayden, and Rachel. I got the chance to know Jes even more and Rachel and Hayden. Hayden didn’t talk as much, but we all hoped he will open up.

Compared to last fall, I was much more outgoing and I talked to almost everyone there. Everyone’s personalities were great. During reconciliation, we had sat in our own spots to think about our lives and how God has influenced us. I thought about my family, especially my mom, and my boyfriend, Michael. I also thought about my friends from high school and the friends I’ve met at Fontbonne. In the small booklet that we all received for the retreat, I wrote down little things and questions from my mind. When I thought about my mom, I teared up a little. She has done so much for me and I hope that she knows how much I care for and love her. God has shown me how to work my way through my struggles and pain.

During reconciliation, Sarah and Brother Brad (I’m not sure who he is or what he looked like!) were doing the “confession” times for anyone who needed to confess or to just talk to. I didn’t feel too much trouble so I stayed at my spot the whole time. We had a long reconciliation, but I was patient and just thought about good things. I prayed for everyone in my life, even for people who I barely talk to.

The fun things that I got to do were games, bonfire, and movie. We played Uno then Phase 10 at one point. I played Uno before, but not Phase 10. I had so much fun with my fellow retreatants. Oh, the food there were very delicious, too.

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by Deanna October 10, 2012

I was blessed with the opportunity to be able to go on a retreat this past weekend with Campus Ministry. I can’t say too much because that would spoil it for any future retreat-goers. But the moral of the story is I had such a great time! The location was absolutely beautiful and we were […]

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Anticipation is Making the Wait Worthwhile

by Alumni Posts October 14, 2011

The word of the week for me is anticipation. I am preparing to go back to Des Moines over the weekend where I grew up and meet up with old friends and family. I am anticipating that this will be a good time but a bittersweet one as well. You should know that I have […]

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Follow Me to the Fall Retreat

by Alumni Posts October 12, 2011

It’s that time of year again! The leaves are changing, the air is crisp, you can wear a jacket to class. Oh wait, it’s 80 degrees in October this year, so you’re probably still wearing your flip flops and shorts. But, nonetheless, it’s still that time of year again! Are you wondering what I’m babbling […]

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Get To Know This Person…

by Lizzie October 6, 2011

I’m just a freshman, so I don’t know too many people just yet. But I think you should get to know Sarah Boul, director of campus ministry. She is an awesome person! During my orientation, I met Sarah and many other faculty and staff. We began talking on the trip to Lake Williamson during a […]

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Conversations with My Community

by Alumni Posts November 1, 2010

One thing I really love about Fontbonne is how easy it is to embed yourself in the community. I’ve been very fortunate in my experiences at this school and have gotten a lot of opportunities that I may not have at a larger school. With all these experiences has come the possibility of making friends […]

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Learning to Dance in the Rain

by Alumni Posts March 12, 2010

Here’s a common anonymous quote that I’ve learned to live by: “Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass; it’s about learning to dance in the rain.“ I’m all about motivational quotes such as the one above. In a literal sense, I thought it to be appropriate for the current conditions, seeing as […]

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